Heavy Metal #270

Figured I'd better get the review in before the next one comes out, scheduled for next week but I probably won't see it until mid-November.  Here goes...

Cover by Pascal Blanche - 7.5 - A more imaginative take on the chick-in-some-getup.  The woman's form, and the coloring and lighting, do evoke a Corben feeling.  It's quite lovely.  The getup is so ridiculous it's amusing, the cross-head screws are just goofy, and the weapon is silly, the sight looks setup for a left hand shooter, but that's not how she's wearing it.  There's a slight interference in the model, the sight on the belly, but mostly it's very well done.  There's detail in the paper cover, the screws and the giant nips for instance, that I just didn't see on the screen in preview images.

An ad for TMNT Minimates?  Ugh.  I wonder how long they'll let him get away with pimping the kid stuff.

The new owners are each credited as "Co-CEO", and this issue's cover as well as last issue's are credited on the contents pages.

Animal'z by Bilal - 8 - And so the story concludes, as obtuse and ethereal as ever.  A polar bear honor guard, the last nihilistic duel, riding or swimming or flying off into the sunset, if there was a sunset.  I won't pretend this had deep emotional meaning to me, or that it was spectacular or action-packed, but I've enjoyed it tremendously.  Seeing Bilal in the pages of Heavy Metal, 37 years after I first did, has been a delight.  And what do you know, there are previews saying another Bilal, Julia and Roem, will start in #272.  Looks like the same art style, I wonder if I'll like it as much.  Something to look forward to.

Surefire Means by Brandon Barrow - 6 - Pretty nice looking art, and a somewhat interesting, though not necessarily original, premise of being lost on an alien planet, but the ending just struck me as dumb.

Artist's Studio by Chris Compston - 6 - I can't say that guitar art interests me much, but he does have some nice ability.

Brom Kah by McCleary, Garret, and Bolt - 6 - Another story with nice looking art, arcane but ponderous storytelling, and a less than inspiring ending.

Sexy World by Enrique Pilozo - 6 - I didn't like it much, but I can appreciate how the sentiment of loneliness in a superficially sex-crazed society, can appeal to the pimply-faced basement dweller, typing alone in a darkened room, in all of us.

Vampire Vixens of the Wehrmacht by Emperor and/or Lex and Campbell - 7 - Despite my relative disinterest in vampire stories, and some really dumb things, like 6 year old Hitler has a toothbrush mustache (I mean, I get ya have ta show it's him, but c'mon), I was able to find some things to like.  Some of the photo-copy/realistic art was enjoyable enough, some of the compositions were really nice, and parts of the often over-the-top story were humorous enough.  There's a promo at the end, promising another story called "Arses High".   I'll try not to get my hopes up too much.

Biological Warfare by Jeff Dyer and Mauro Balloni - 3 - I actually disliked this one.  Even the pedestrian art is better than the clumsy character stereotypes and stupid execution of a simplistic premise.  Sorry guys, but the bad Middle Eastern Terrorist bit really struck a nerve with me, that kind of shit pisses me off.  Better luck next time.

Two Peas in a Pod by Wren - 6 - Y'know, at least these clumsy character stereotypes (nice muttonchops) are in a bit more fanciful story, and are more funny and less offensive.  The story is sparse, a spaceship captain looking to release her ship from an asteroid, discovers a hidden world and sparks upheaval.  I enjoyed the art, though sometimes it's less than precise, it's nice to look at.  And speaking of coincidences, of course the giant space suit can hold two women, who of course take a fancy to each other, supporting another slightly less offensive clumsy stereotype.

Just One Feeling by Christian Endres and Christian Krank - 7 - Just one page but it has a story.  I like the art style, and there is a feeling.  Would you feel sympathy for orphaned alien zombie kids?

A full page ad for Heavy Metal dot com, with art someone actually worked on, another HM logo treatment with slotted screws, and a dorky-on-purpose tagline.  The cosmic confluence of meaning and superficiality, of brilliance and stupidity, of the incredibly crappy mess the HM website is now, and the paper in my hands, blows my mind.

Close Call by Sytse S. Algera and Apri Kusbiantoro - 5 - a somewhat interesting premise, of disease-fighting nanobots rescuing beach-goers, enhances the ok storytelling and art.

Oskar Ed by Branko Jelinek - 6 - I really liked the animal, it's drawn well.  The story tries for mysterious and imaginative, almost gets there.

Saskatchewan by Lee Nielsen - 6 - I think I know the despairing self-awareness that I think this is trying to convey, but I think I'm missing some of what it's trying to say too.  The art's pretty cool, I like the writing, but there seems to be more put into it than what I get from it.

Autopsy by Gonzalo Ruggieri - 7 - simple but funny, "no sign of intelligence" indeed.

Gallery by Pascal Blanche - 7 - A lot of this looks really nice, very well executed digitally composed portraits.  Some of them look very much like digital models, rather than an actual character, but I suppose that's ok.  There's not a lot of personality or emotion available, but they look nice.

M19:  Secret Agent Daphne in "An Awesome Weekend" by JD and JMB - 6 - Nice looking one-page spy story.  A "See you in sixty days, metalheads!" suggests this will be a recurring entry.

Back Cover by Pascal Blanche - 7 - nice looking and radiantly colored, it looks better on the cover than in the Gallery.

So, there were a few good things to recommend this issue, and a couple not so much.  My sentiment is on the positive side, I've seen a lot worse.  Next up is an Asylum Press issue, so we'll see what that brings.